Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Birthday Pictures and Update

So here are the pictures from my mums truly was an amazing day! My mom was sooo happy and the day was filled with laughter and picture taking. =]

Our family in front of the Castle.

Kristin [my cousin] and Bob [her boyfriend]

My extremely Happy and Attractive Husband, spinning me and mum on the tea cup ride.

Nate, Me, and Justin @ Epcot

Me and My Mum on the Splash Mountain Ride

Me and My Daddy

Beautiful Birthday Girl

Other than that, Nathan talked with his parents on Sunday and we officially are on a break. Nathan in turn has felt a tremendous relief, which I pray I will soon feel as well. Something encouraging, was the difference in the conversations, they seemed a lot more understanding this week, Nathan is concerned though that it might be because I wasn't there involved in the conversation. I pray this is not the case, it's just a crummy situation all together. It sucks b/c my words seem worthless and Nathan has a hard time portraying how he feels a lot, it makes communication very hard...I know a few people responded to my last post and encouraged me greatly! Thank you! If I could ask a question...How do you explain to someone that they haven't accepted you into their family? I mean clearly there have been a number of times I've been accepted...but they are mostly holidays which clearly I wouldn't be left out of and things I've specifically spoken up about to say I want to be included...I wonder if I will never be accepted in the way I wish, and need to just realize that they are accepting me in the way they think is acceptable...should there be a striving to meet in the middle, to explain why I feel unaccepted, or just let it go and be content with what I have. One thing I do know, is that the words every and never, are not helpful in disagreements...everyone in their faults has times where they do things correctly it's the habit that's the issue...
I'm doing a lot of praying and Nathan has been chatting a lot with my dad who has had similar problems in the past with his own family, my dad has been sharing what things he learned, the advice he received from a pastor, and so on...that's one thing I love about my dad as well and something that he has instilled in me, is always looking at things from both sides asking questions to bring out the root of issues the motives for's been quite helpful, we do not want to act improperly, we want to take responsibility for our part, we want to have peace, what want most of all is just to have resolution.
Thanks for listening to me blather on, a lot of changes have taken place recently, so please be praying for provision, wisdom and continued hope on the grayer days!
Blessings to you and your families.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Happy Birthday Mum

Celebrating my Mum's birthday tomorrow! So I have to head to bed pretty quick here after a yummy bowl of Strawberry Cheesecake Ice-Cream [with half the fat supposedly] and a quick glimpse at the movie Big Business while falling into sweet slumber.

Tomorrow it worked out fantastic for our whole family to have the day off, we didn't even ask for it off! Nate just had the day off and so did I! God is so good! =] So we are spending the whole day at Disney [my mum's favorite place in the whole world] and then having dinner at a place called Ohana's [which means family] it's Hawaiin themed as well which is another favorite of hers. Not only are we going to be there but my brother as well AND my cousin and her new beau, whom I've never met so it should be a fabulous day! I'm very excited, a day with my family is always a good day!


We love you dearly...

Me and my Mum

Nathan and Mum

Have a great day everyone! Remember to celebrate the ones you love!

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Believing for Peace

My heart is a bit sad today. There are so many amazing things going on in our life right now. God is just clearly opening up doors and making a way for us that is beyond exciting. We are feeling so alive, so in harmony, our marriage is just amazing, our house is cleaner, we are more calm, more peaceful everything is amazing except for one thing.

Our sermon on Sunday was very eye opening to me, I was talking with my mom about sometimes it's hard for me working at the job I have because there is little understanding or respect for my Christianity. I told my boss that I needed Thursday nights off, because I have choir practice and she said oh b/c of some church crap. I was surprised that I wasn't offended or even hurt, it just made my heart sad for her. The joy and fullfillment I find in Christ is just so beyond words that anyone not partaking that I feel is missing out!

Well I was talking with her also about, finding lines, I don't ever want someone to feel like I'm pushing something on them, but I also don't want to endorse things that the Bible is clear about being sin/wrong. I don't consider myself a judgemental person, and I have been confirmed in this by quite a few people, christian and unchristian alike. It's something I personally strive for, that is to not be judgemental. However, I know that as a Christian, the Bible tells me the world will hate me, because the world hated Jesus, truth does not rub the world the right way. [that's a quote from my pastor] I need to not be trying to make everyone feel better about their sin, b/c I have fear of being perceived as judgemental. I can't not say something just because I have stuff in my own life that needs changing, that's the beauty of fellowship you help one another out with your stuff. I tend to be a little too accepting I think of sin in others lives b/c I don't want them to be hurt by yet another Christian. It's tough when Jesus is so amazing and so many Christians are unloving and judgemental. In an effort to not be that though some end up accepting everything! Which is not the way of Christ, yes we are to LOVE EVERYONE, but sometimes that love is a tough love. It's saying what you don't want to say, it's speaking truth. [this was all the sermon on Sunday] He spoke of the fact that the church has lost it's conviction. And the fact is, God is very clear about things being right or wrong, yes approach in love, but stand for what's correct and just. The worst part of it all, we will be misunderstood, and misjudged...people will call us judgemental, which is where we double examine our hearts to make sure we are not, but then we have to find peace in Christ, we have to allow Him to be our defender. When we don't word things correctly, we need to get back up and try again, God knows my heart, he knows I have a love for people, I need to stop being wishy washy, I need to stop looking to certain people in my life for justification, my justification is in Christ. I am on this earth for His purposes and His plans, and how He wants to fullfill those in my life, I need to be open to that.

Things sadly are not going well my husbands family and us. It truly breaks my heart, and I think what hurts even more is it would appear, things will not be resolved anytime soon. We have been perceived in a certain way for so long...and we are taking a breath, remembering that we are not perfect, finding that rest I've been talking about, and letting God do our defending. It's tough, I want to rise up and defend myself, I want acceptence, I want justification in who I am, as does Nathan. However we are learning to rely on God for those things, and not family. It's tough, because family can play such an amazing role in your life, but it can also play such a harmful one, in this time of growth and eye opening, learning and so's important that we keep focused on God and not get distracted. I explained it to my mom in this way: Nathan and I are growing so much, I see God working in both of us in amazing ways, if family is going to be a hindrance to that then we need to break away from that for a time, so that we can focus on God and not be consistantly challenged with keeping our joy. It was awesome b/c I used to word hindrance and one of the verses she had found in her quiet time that morning was Joel 2:12 amplified version: ..."says the Lord, turn and keep on coming to Me with all your heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning [until every hinderance is removed and the broken fellowship is restored.]"
Our broken fellowship with the Lord is the most important thing for us to repair at this point in our lives, we are learning and are sure to make mistakes, but the point is not to dwell on the mistakes but the growth. So if you could just pray for us, to continue having that peace, being misunderstood is such a hard thing for me, and I need to get over it, especially in this situation. ::BIG SIGH::

Would so appreciate it if anyone has encouragement! Hope you are all having a FABULOUS week! I pray blessings for anyone who reads this.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Just back from an AMAZING choir practice! I'm singing on stage this Sunday! WOWZER I'm a little nervous but SUPER excited God is good! and I'm learning SO much, and finding SO much rest it's amazing. I haven't felt so peaceful in so long and it's amazing I can't describe it any other way.

Nate and I had an amazing Easter! Everything was amazing and better than we expected and the time we got together was amazing. I can't even begin to tell you the blessing it is to me that Nathan and my family meld so well together. It's like he's been a part of my family forever and it warms my heart. Here are some pictures like I promised... =]
Us before Good Friday Service
This was a completely candid and accidental picture that is awesome and sahows such brotherly love...haha =]

Flowers for both us from Nathan [what a good hubby I have!]

After the Passover Seder
Us at the Sunrise Service 6:30am It was GREAT!
Us on our way to church, Happy Easter!
At Church
Nate and His Church Mama, Druscilla
Nathan's grandma used to make lamb EVERY Easter, and so this year I decided to make it for him in rememberance of that tradition and the beginning/keeping on of that tradition in our family, he was VERY excited and everyone loved it! [I was happy since I never made it before!]
Me and the first Trifle I've ever made

Justin Taking a ridiculously large bite of potatoes

Lemon Blueberry Trifle it was my pride and the lamb was my joy! =]
So there is a mini update, it takes so long to upload pictures on here I tell you! =] Things are good with us though, we were able to repack some boxes and reorganize things so things won't be so hectic when we move, that makes me feel a TON better. Especially since the next couple of months are kind of busy with birthdays, a couple weddings and mothers day and then church events and possible new jobs [again lol] so I'm not sure how well I will be at updating but please keep us in your prayers! God is good!
Till next time be Blessed!

Monday, April 6, 2009

Amazing Sunday

I know it's not Friday but my husband melts my heart and I just wanted to share the text he just sent me! This is our text convo!

Me: Can't wait to see you! Listened to part 1 of yesterdays sermons, it's raining! Awesome1 Bout to grab a book do load of whites and eat something can't wait 2 c u!

Nate: I luv you more than a storm & a good book, more than hot chocolate on a snowy day, & more than a million dollars a day for the rest of my life! I luv you more!

Me: Awww....lover you amaze me and take my breath away

Nate: Only because I'm in awe of u every single day. I am captured by ur spirit & ur face is the beautiful bow on a perfect gift given to me by our creator and king!

Me: :o) thanks baby, I needed that!

What a sweetie eh? I love him so much. We had an amazing day yesterday, church was beyond amazing! Went to membership class yesterday with rents. We actually become members in a month or so I guess, they only accept members 4 times a year, and they announce it a couple weeks in advance so...pumped for that when it happens! We got a ton more info about getting involved and a program they run through the church for college credit, interning in every ministry for a month, it's pretty amazing. The sermon was amazing he talked about the rules of engagement! The spirit was present like whoa! I was truly blessed and got some couped up tears out. Nathan and I both went up for the alter call and cried together. It was an amazing moment. It was encouraging and hopeful b/c it was an alter call for people who were tired of being where they are and believe that God has got something coming. It was for people that feel attacked, and opposed all the time and need refreshing...anyway when they post it online I'll post the link so you can go check it out b/c it blew us away! I talked with the choir director about joining choir and will hopefully start the process next week! =] I love being where I'm supposed to be! I love being in Florida, I love being married to Nathan, I love the time I have with my parents, I just am loving life right now, and I'm deciding to love life from now on. Circumstances will constantly come and try to take our joy, we must not let them win.
I wasn't able to do the ended up being a little more expensive then expected so maybe next year! Still excited about this coming weekend, we are going to a good friday service at noon too! And Saturday Nathan and I are going to the beach just the two of us. [I got a new suit too! it was on sale from $150 to $30 God is good!]
It was a great Sunday and this week is pretty low key, just cleaning up the mess that became when I was sick, it's not actually that bad, Nate's a good helper and I was stubborn some days and cleaned even thouh I felt like crap. haha
Have a great week ladies! Be blessed!

Friday, April 3, 2009

My Husband Rocks and A Praise Report!

In our home, we have specifically been focused on being happy for others when good things happen. When so and so gets a new car, or another couple is pregnant, their buying a house, so and so got a promotion...sometimes we feel a bit looked over, left out and behind, but what an amazing feeling to TRULY be happy for someone in their successes!?!? Well the other day a friend of ours from CFNI chatted with me a bit online and told me that he just got offered the job he has been praying for over in Germany. They are paying for all of his stuff to be moved paying the temaining payments for his laser eye surgery and he gets to be by this girl he has been talking with and hopefully start a relationship! How good is God! I was overjoyed for him, truly and utterly overjoyed and then I was overjoyed that I was so excited for him and didn't think at all about my situation and didn't start thinking about what was missing from my life. I was just happy. It not only made me happy but it encouraged me and I left the conversation feeling uplifted and hopeful. I brought this to my husband's attention when I told him another couple from CFNI we know is pregnant. He let out a sigh and I told him about the amazing feeling I had when I released my desire to be a mom. I found rest, that I've been talking about, and I found it with this too. I can only do so much and I need to stop putting so much pressure on myself about things I can not change or help anymore than what I've already done!
This afternoon Nathan got home and was all excited to tell me about how he was excited with a guy at work today about something and how I was right it was such an amazing feeling. My husband rocks because he's learning to be truly happy for others. He listened to me and let me be a helper, and well he is just an amazing husband all around.
Our marriage just continues to blossom and it brings joy to my heart.

Something amazing that happened after all this, is we got a call from our insurance guy, about the car accident claim we filed. Well what happened was the cop at the scene suggested a certain amount, that sounded nice to us! Then we had the evaluation and the quote was a bit less then what the cop had said but was still better then nothing, well today like I said the insurance guy called and told us how much they are giving us and its a bit more than what the cop suggested! How exciting is that! AND what is soooo exciting about that is that with this money, we will only be a few hundred dollars from being debt free [not including school loans] isn't that EXCITING!!! =] I'm soooo pumped!!!! Debt free is an amazing thought and there have been many times we thought we were close and then we seemed to take a step back now it finally seems within grasp and it is really the most amazing feeling ever.

So besides that, things are amazing. I had dinner today at the house with a friend I used to work with at Michaels, which was nice. Looking forward to Sunday all day with my hubby, and now I'm about to watch Grease have an amazing new popsicle that my hubby picked me up at the store Mango Pomegrante...another reason why my husband rocks! He knows how much I love pomegrante and picked them up for me b/c he thought I'd like them and he loves me. =] What a blessed woman I am. Even when I don't see it, I truly am blessed.

Talk to you later everyone, thanks for the get well wishes! My ear finally unplugged and I feel a ton better, planning on getting on top of blogland after Easter craziness! =]