Wednesday, December 31, 2008

A New Year

I am excited for the New Year and decided that for the new year this blog will change from our baby voyage [that is now put on hault] to my voyage through this coming year. I'm beliving that God has big things in store and I look forward to sharing them on here, I've decided to focus more on flaws, my strengths, my passions, dreams, calling...I want to transform this year. Get a little bit of the old me back, find a little bit of me that's been hiding. Nathan and I are planning on enjoying being married more, and the many adventures of just being us.

We really made a list of exciting things to do this coming year, a lot of them don't even cost money! I'm dieing to share them on here, but as I've found before, sharing every detail can sometimes be more dissappointing down the road, so I think I'm going to try and share as we go along!


Saturday, December 13, 2008

A Broken Heart

In the busyness of life the blog has been neglected again, completely understandable. I have decided to take a break from the comp and the phone for awhile, although I may listen to voicemails, and check emails I'm not replying to anyone, just for awhile. Some very crummy things are going on in me and my life right now, and at the moment, which of course could change after a nice chat with Nate and a good night sleep, I feel an urge to cut myself off from people.

I'm tired of hurting people, being misunderstood, and all the drama. I have looked around and realized how much drama is there and am just disgusted...this is not what life should be like, the people I love the most shouldn't feel the way they feel about me, around me, or while talking to me.

So the soul searching, the life changing, the healing, and growth will hopefully begin and I will come out the other side better, renewed and stronger. I can't even identify myself in the muck that I have become and so my hope is that is can only improve. I know no one reads this anymore so I don't expect any response, this is not a cry for attention, this is me waking up and smelling the nasty burnt coffee and saying THINGS MUST CHANGE.

and if by chance someone does read this, Thanks for understanding, or maybe not even understanding because I doubt no one really will, but thanks for not freaking out and worrying about me, just shouting out a prayer for someone who is at this moment truly broken hearted.